Graduating

And just like that they are done. College, is now a thing of the past for them. They came here, four years ago as anxious, eager, ambitious young freshmen ready to take on the world. Ready to be liberated from the chains of their parents and their past. Ready to have a fresh start. Ready to try and explore new things, ready to figure out who they really were and what they really believed in. These four years have taught them so many things. Things that they could never learn from simply reading textbooks.

Graduating means more than just receiving a degree. Graduating is more than just a form of certification or sign of aptitude. It means ending or leaving behind a part of their life that, at one point, meant so much to them. Maybe not immediately…but eventually. Of course this is not the case for all things, but it is for some….and that… is scary.

Friendships were made, some that will last a life time, but many more that will just remain in the bubble of the four years of their college life. Friendships that just decorate their memories while they were here. Memories that will slowly begin to rot away with the passage of time. Eventually to become nothing more than just piles of old photographs and happy memories. It’s scary to think about this. But it’s true. They’ve made so many friends here, but they are all going separate ways now. It would be a miracle for them to ALL keep in touch 10, 20, even 30 years from now.

It’s scary how fast time has gone. They were all just freshmen not too long ago. With no direction, no goal but to enjoy this stage of their life. College is suppose to be some of the greatest years of your life so why worry about anything else?

But it’s over now. Now they must move on to the next stage of their life. All the things they’ve learned in college, they must now apply it to the real world. Now it’s time for them to leave the safe walls of the university and grow up. Grow up and become adults. This moment has come so much faster than anyone could have expected. It comes whether you are ready for it or not. It waits for no one. And that fact itself, is utterly terrifying.

But what is scarier than any of this……….

Is that I’m next……….

Am I……. ready?….

저 그림같은 하늘로 날아가고파….

Mystery Chem Girl Finale

So this mystery chem girl …is no longer mysterious…

A friend of mine at state found out who she is! I can’t believe she found her! What a small world!!!

But sadly….She has a boyfriend…and she’s actually not Korean!!! T____T I couldn’t believe it…………..

My world was crushed when I found out………

I stalked her a bit..and she actually doesnt look like I remembered…I suppose cuz I spent most of my time looking at the back of her….

oh well.. I guess it’s good to finally find out who this girl was…and to have closure kekeke

This mystery girl’s name will not be revealed. I will save her poor soul from any more stalking..I feel like I’ve done that enough for her lifetime haha

But anyway, yes…This is the end of Mysterious Chem Girl.

R.I.P Summer of 2010

“When we have nothing left but God,
we discover that God is enough.”

God doesn’t always give us what we want. But He always provides us with what we need.

May this be my prayer.

jlee

Aww!! Jlee nanu said she likes my posts! It encouraged me to write more! So I’ll dedicate this post to her ^^

Jlee nanu~ bogosheepso~ keke I really do miss you though~ Man kasa was so fun when you were here for sure. (I miss KASA too actually… haha)

Let’s see….let’s start off with first impression

To be 100% honest..I don’t remember the first time we met >.< sorry! But what I DO remember..is that you were extremely nice! I remember thinking, wow this senior cares enough about us freshmen to actually take precious time out of her senior year to hang out with us. I just remember thinking that was really cool. When we (freshman boys jree fanclub) were with you, it felt like you treated us like your friends instead of your underclassmen underlings which I really admired and enjoyed. You know most seniors feel like they are at the top of the chain, they are ready to move on to bigger and better things, no time to meet new people for just one year and then peace. But you never felt that way! And I’m glad!

First semester I suppose we didn’t know each other THAT well, I just came in as fresh rep and started workin for you haha. It wasn’t until second semester when we became closer~ You made me take that stupid music class with you!!! But don’t worry! I don’t regret taking it at all~ The memories and friendship that came out of it is far better than the grade that I received ^^ 

I remember sleeping in the craige study lounge studying for the exam. Late nights at bschool listening to some random music that we would have to identify later…

Food was very big in our friendship. Haha, we got many meals together right? Actually, i know we got bali a few times….and what not….iunno im sure we ate plenty…

KASA pre and post korea night was also very fun, recording meta sleeping in his various positions while eating up on some dino nuggets and wendys spicy chicken nuggets~

Man!! I almost cried at senior banquet when we had to give a speech! I wanted to say so much more than I did! But I knew I was gonna cry if I did~ But one thing that I really was sad about, was the fact you were a senior my freshmen year and that you had to leave so quickly! But atleast you live in raleigh so we got to see each other a few more times! But now you are off to some far away place to enhance your education farther! haha

Well I just wanna say thank you jree nanu for being such a good sun bae and role model! Even though every time you got mad you seemed to take it out on me! ( like in the car when you dropped me off at morrison T_T ) haha I do appreciate everything you did for us as freshmen and hope that everything goes well for your future!

Thanks a bunch and God bless! ^_________________^

what the tumblr

hello tumblr

It’s been a LONG time since i’ve even checked this thing and so much about it has changed

I see so many like…reposts of stuff, rage comics and what not! Tumblr used to be all about posting your thoughts and emotions etc…but now it seems to be all about posting things you found interesting and what not.

Not saying it’s good or bad, it is definitely really entertaining! I love seeing all the funny posts! I was literally just scrolling down for the past hour or so just reading old posts. 

Anyway, reading some of my old stuff made me want to publish another entry…

It’s junior year. Time sure goes by quickly in college. My semester is mad chill now that I am a psych major. Almost too chill..good grades come with very little effort…so opposite of what I’m used to…But I haven’t actually taken any exams yet so I guess it’s too early to tell. But for now, I can’t complain about the work load or the grades i’m getting haha.

I recently started volunteering/shadowing at a dental clinic in university mall. To be honest………It’s incredibly boring….. I basically just sit there since I’m so useless haha. I just watch them clean teeth or pull teeth or whatever. But they ladies there are so nice! So that makes it somewhat better…haha

To be honest I guess there has been a lot on my mind lately…

And I feel so lost and confused sometimes… I can’t explain it. Or maybe I don’t want to explain it.

I don’t know,

many things actually

I don’t know many things.

well it’s getting late….and gotta wake up for church tomorrow.. g’night everyone

see you in another 4 months tumblr~

Home

I never thought I would ever actually miss this place. I never knew how much I love this place. I just got home from dropping off Joy and Alex and was driving around Fayetteville and the song Airplane came on. It made me so nostalgic….

Last year I remember thinking, man college is great, this is my new home, fayetteville? what is that? I never wanna go back to the trash place of a town i used to call home. But now almost two years of college have passed. While I was driving around, a rush of memories and mixed emotions filled my heart, and it was uncontainable.

I drove down Skibo past the Cliffdale intersection and feel an odd sense of my faith returning to me. memories of driving to church, driving to praise team practice. this was who i was, this was where i used to be.

I spent about 18 years of my life in this town, how could I just forget about it and abandon it so easily? So many of my best memories are contained in this town. Whether I like it or not, this town is a part of me, always and forever.

I started to get really sad at one point in my drive, because I knew that I could never have this back again. The memories of speeding down skibo because I was late to church. Memories of driving to the taco bell near Lowe’s during my senior year lunch times. Everything was gone. I no longer live in this town, I only come to visit, and seldom do I visit……

Soon I’ll be graduating, and moving on, even further from this town. Maybe not in distance, but these memories will continue to be buried deeper and deeper into my mind.

I wish I could express how nostalgic I feel right now. How much I miss my middle school and high school years. How much I miss being a resident of this town. How I miss belonging here in Fayetteville with the rest of the Academy kids. Basketball practice after school. I miss you. Soccer practice after school. I miss you. Band concerts on Thursday nights. I miss you.

Fayetteville I have missed you.

I don’t know what it is, but I realize now. That Fayetteville has been, is still, and will continue to be my home. Too much of me is in this town…but more importantly, too much of this town is still a part of me.

So although I may complain that you are boring, that you provide me with nothing, that you are just an ugly unexciting bore……. I really mean to say, that I love having you as me hometown.

sometimes dying seems so easy